HRUMPH!

REGAN SMASH! REGAN SMASH! REGAN...sleepy...These words are an inspiration to the little people everywhere. Yes evan you can grow up to be STRONG LIKE HULK. I enjoy punching things with my fists. Walls, balls, midgits...the list goes on, but I would trade it all for just one shot one chance to...fight Chuck Norris in an ultimate fight to the death. He would use the Norris Beat Down style while I use drunken monkey. And I figure I'ld have to be drunk before I'ld even considered fighting CHUCK NORRIS!!!In the eyes of a ranger the unsuspecting stranger...sorry I phased out there...uh...where were we? Oh, yeah! and that is why Democracy will never take hold in China. Also I feel monkey AIDS probaly wont help much either,hmm either way once the Jedi squirrls declare war on the Nazi porcupines the world is just going to move to Albequerke..albaqurque albaqwerky...How the hell Do you spell that?uh any way that place in New..thats right NEW mexico and we'll all loose our glasses.

Um...boat?

Sorry about not blogging recently, I was infected by rabid zombie aids and had to be shot several times in the face, but I'm all better now. Actually my site has been blocked by my schools evil censorship board, I'm both honored, but I'm also quite sad because this cuts off my main income. Board school kids who like funny pictures.Poop balls. Well my waffle iron is trying to kill me again. I need a sandwich wheres the cat? Oh right, I put it in the blender. DARN YOU SHEEHAN HIGH!!!! This is like the time Peter thought he could take on the Incredible Hulk.

Gotta go Gotta go

OK so I dont have much time to type today so let me just leave it at this. Donky Kong beats bowser. Thats all Im saying. its true. Now I know this isnt what you were expexting, but this is all I have. Bowser is cool, but I feel that a cocanut gun will take him down. Sparkle Sparkle. The stars from mario must be some sort of drug that you absorb through the skin. It makes you feel invicible, you here music and you see flying sparks. doodoodoodoodadoodoodadoodadoodoo. sparkle. I LIKE NINTEDO WIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!! Ha ahahhahahah ha

Waka Waka

Crank 2...(sigh) what can I say? Nothing except that it was AMAZING. I enjoyed it fully. Like I enjoy a good Vault. Not the safe the actual drink. Its SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO GOOOOOOOOOD!!! and yet they no longer sell it at Stop ang Shop, and that makes me a sad panda. Quick qeston and you may of heard this on south park. If Pandas live in mountainous regions of China then how do they maintain a diet of bamboo which grows in more temprate climates? And if Stewie is gay then why does he like Susie Swanson? And if I have a red cube and Johny has 2 red cubes and if energy equals mass times the speed of light squared, how many times his waight can Sonic the Hedgehog eat in one lunar year? I beg you to answer and please let me know. waffle iron

Pain is fun..except when it isnt

So I suppose you all saw the speed skating accident at the Olypics. because we all watch the Olympics...right? Anywho it was FR$EKINMG AWESOME. The guy was like AHHHH and the audience was WOOOOAHHH and I was eating pancakes going GLUHBLUHGLUH. Best. Taco. Ever. but I digress for we have all had pain happen to us at some time. Like when I slammed the handle bar of my bike into my gonads. Or when I tried to grind down a railing, slipped and hit my gonads or when my freind CREATE OWN WORD a BLANK into someone's BLANK. but I digress for we all know that beer before wine makes you feel fine...or is it the other way around? but again I digress for I am typing this at school while being stalked by a freshman and getting a weird stare from the librarian who apparenty kills trolls for fun and has a machete in her office "to deal with them bossing yankees", the draft of todays blog has been unread by human eyes, unheard by human ears, untill now, thank you magic blue jar.

Make up your own title

First off I would like to start out by apologizing for my last post. I would especially like to extend my apology to the Muslims of Vatican City and to my hairstylist Rofaldo.
Now. Why do I have a box of rusty slutty nails at the bottom of my stairs? I mean its an obvious safety risk.I believe, to be entirely true, that the nails are multiplying amongst themselves. There were but 100 rusty old hand made nails in the box ( truth be told it is some kid of jar, perhaps for glue or paint thinner). It was in the middle of the night about a month ago when I was walking down the stairs to my kitchen for a gin and tonic that I happened upon a nail on the step. My bare foot upon the nail, I jumped forward in pain falling in a sprawl on the tile below. I went back (now suffering form great hurt) to see why the nail was on the step and to my shock I saw the jar so full that there was indeed no room for this one lonely nail. They were growing. I new it and now their numbers had grown so large that there was not even room for their own. A mass of procreation. The whores, those slutty nails and their uncontrollable urges had pushed their very existence to the brink of destruction and now I am paying the cost. I could move them. I should move them, but I wont. Why? because I have a dentist appointment, and my shoes are to big, and leaving you with that I must go. It's nearly 4 o'clock.

And four makes Seven

Why do cats always appear at the most inopportune times? When I'm eating, cat. When I'm sleeping, cat. When I'm in the shower, cat. I swear stalker kitty is amongst us and deserves the same respect as man bear pig and Dick Cheney. Also why do cats ask for food when you are clearly eating something that cats don't eat? "Yum, this cat sandwich tastes great! oh do you want some? How about...NO!" (sigh) but I digress. To put simply cats are moochers who never stop. Are you a moocher? if so please knock it off. Oh and today's topic for discussion is feline AIDS. Bye Bye. Fizzle goblle wazzle